An interesting new trend is happening: Boomers (born between 1946 and 1964) are divorcing at higher rates than any other generation, with women filing for dissolution of marriage more than men. Even under the best of circumstances, divorce is an overwhelming process that will bring unprecedented changes to your life.

Divorce is complicated at any stage of life. It can be messy and lead to an emotional and financial overload. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed, especially as that list grows. Having a sense of what to expect will save you some grief, time and money. To help prepare you, continue reading so you will know what to do next.

Quick Tips to Prepare for Divorce

• Open a checking account and savings account in your name alone.
• Open a credit card in your name alone.
• Order a free credit report. The first step in splitting up your debts is identifying them. That’s where a credit report comes in. A credit report will help you identify any debts that you’re responsible for. Better yet, sign up for a credit monitoring service like LifeLock. You’ll get notified if your spouse attempts to open credit cards and rack up debt in your name. The peace of mind is well worth the cost of the credit report.
• Set up a new email account and/or P.O. Box. You do not want your spouse intercepting sensitive and critical information that you will be exchanging with various parties. Keep your privacy intact by also getting a separate phone number as well.
• Make a list of all the assets and liabilities you know about. Include any memberships, reward points and other perks that may be considered as assets (often called hidden assets).
• Oklahoma law (43 O.S. §110A.1.h) requires each party to deliver to the other “within 30 days from the earlier of either the date of service of the summons or the filing of an initial pleading by the respondent,” the following documents:
  • The federal and state income tax returns of each party for the past two years and any nonpublic, limited partnership and privately held corporate returns for any entity in which either party has an interest, together with all supporting documentation for the tax returns, including but not limited to W-2 forms, 1099 forms, K-1 forms, Schedule C and Schedule E. If a return is not completed at the time of disclosure, the parties shall provide the documents necessary to prepare the tax return of the party, to include W-2 forms, 1099 forms, K-1 forms, copies of extension requests and estimated tax payments,
  • Two months of the most recent pay stubs from each employer for whom the party worked,
  • Statements for the past six months for all bank accounts held in the name of either party individually or jointly, or in the name of another person for the benefit of either party, or held by either party for the benefit of the minor child or children of the parties,
  • Documentation regarding the cost and nature of available health insurance coverage for the benefit of either party or the minor child or children of the parties,
  • Documentation regarding the cost and nature of employment or educationally related childcare expenses incurred for the benefit of the minor child or children of the parties, and
  • Documentation regarding all debts in the name of either party individually or jointly, showing the most recent balance due and payment terms.

If you don’t normally handle family finances, you could be in for some big surprises. Creditors don’t care about your divorce. They only care about you meeting your financial obligations. If your name is attached to a debt, whether you know it or not, you are legally responsible for it. It’s no fun being in the dark about your finances, but it’s okay. The goal at this point is to begin identifying the puzzle pieces.

Get Your Divorce Paperwork Together

Legal Documents:

Prepare any relevant court orders from prior legal matters involving family law issues.  Having these documents ready helps streamline the process with your attorney and sets clear expectations moving forward.

Gather any previous divorce decrees or annulment records if either spouse has been previously married.  Were any children adopted during the marriage?  If so, a certified copy of the adoption decree is also helpful.

Financial Documents:

Collecting these documents early can create clarity, understand what you need, and streamline negotiations.  In addition to the financial documents mandated by Oklahoma law (see above), also gather up:

• investment portfolios and statements.
• retirement plan statements and summaries (e.g. 401(k)s, IRAs, TSP, SoonerSave, etc).
• documentation of debts.
• credit card statements.
• loans and mortgages.
• create a budget.

Divorce costs money, so budget accordingly.  How you choose to proceed will directly impact how much your divorce will cost. Generally, the more cooperative you are with your spouse, the cheaper the experience will be. Consider whether spending a couple of thousand dollars versus tens of thousands of dollars will benefit you in the long run.

Understanding assets and liabilities creates a comprehensive picture of your finances now, during and after divorce.

Custody Documents:

A parenting plan is one key document that outlines how parents will cooperate in raising their children post-divorce. This should include schedules for holidays, weekends, and special occasions.

Additionally, any existing court orders related to custody need to be included in your checklist. If there are changes from previous agreements or new arrangements being proposed, it’s vital to document these formally.

Insurance Documents:

Gather health insurance policies, which may need to be adjusted or switched following the separation.

Next, consider life insurance policies. If there’s a policy for either spouse, reviewing the beneficiary designations is essential. You might want to change beneficiaries or update coverage amounts based on new financial responsibilities.

Remember auto and homeowners’ insurance. Review these policies, too, since separating joint policies into individual ones is often necessary after a divorce.

Marital Agreements:

Marital agreements, such as prenuptial or postnuptial agreements, outline the rights and responsibilities of both parties regarding property division and spousal support. These agreements can significantly impact how assets are divided during a divorce.

Estate Planning:

Changes may need to be made to wills or trusts that currently include your spouse.

Updating beneficiary designations on accounts like life insurance and retirement plans is also necessary. If these documents still name your ex-spouse, it could lead to unintended consequences after your passing. Make sure all documentation reflects your current wishes.

Consider creating new powers of attorney or healthcare proxies as well. If you cannot do so yourself, you want someone you trust to make decisions.

Put Together Your Divorce Document Checklist with an Attorney’s Help

A divorce document checklist helps ensure you have everything needed to move forward legally and financially. Doerner is here to help you through every step of the divorce process. We have the experience needed to navigate even the most complex divorces. Schedule a consultation to discuss your case.